By Jacqui IWU
FRI, APRIL 20 2018-theG&BJournal-This is all about how the frustrating Stress conditions and the overall body, wellness, emotional, psychological problems that comes with it and the unawareness of Nigerians on danger it posses to health.
Stress is a huge health condition that destabilises the body and in extreme cases leads to passing out and in most cases the individual can’t pinpoint what’s happening. How about couples who are having problems making babies? The stress accumulation weakens the man’s sperm, overhauls the woman’s menstrual and body circle making it very difficult for her to conceive. The children are also not left out. A lot of children in Nigeria come from homes where parents live like cat and dog daily and because most of them do not really understand why their parents behave the way they do to each other, these children silently suffer from the stress especially if their parents are separated.
In my line of work, I encounter such children regularly and believe me, it is not fun for them. I have been caught between a couple who are divorced and their son living with the man.
Here is an example-My management recieved a letter from the father asking us not to allow the mum to visit the boy who is a teenager any longer. The next day, the mum came furiously demanding to talk to her son. How exactly do you ban a mother from talking to her son? It’s not like she came to take him by force but the ex- husband gave orders that we should not allow her to see the boy. It was actually a very dicey situation to carry out this man’s order because we were also trying not to let the little boy witness the whole drama his parents created.
Meanwhile, the mum has been coming to the same organization to visit him and suddenly the husband banned her. If you were the boy and you waited for your mum who usually visits often for some time to come and she never shows up, how would you feel?
Lots of Nigerian children who are caught up in this marriage rut often pass through a lot of stress which their parents create for them. Of course I will not blame them for not knowing how to manage their stress because they do not even understand what stress is all about. This story is just one instance, how children who observe their estranged parents fight day after day. Such parents care less about how their children feel and these children gets to school, or meet with their peers and they behave abnormally…most times acting out of anger from what they saw happening at home.
Every average Nigeria if asked how he/she is doing in this country will be quick to tell you how almost every basic facility required for good standard of living hardly exist.
Just living in a house without steady water and power supply has its own damage(in and out) not to talk about the hooligans, pick pockets, fraudsters all over the streets of this country…being allowed to operate in broad day light by our authorities thereby making life unpleasant for others. Tell me how those who sleep in sweaty –stuffy rooms can come out with smooth glowing skins and well rested to perform? They are always tired, non-productive and cranky. They will get to their work place shouting to everyone without even knowing they are shouting. All these contributes to health and emotional problems. Most people will sweat the whole day under the scorching sun we have here and go home not taking a bath which I find very unhygienic and unhealthy. No matter how tired you are, when you get home. Those who do have water, always get home very exhausted either from the nerve wrecking traffic jams or cueing for fuel at Gas stations. Most Nigerians even sleep at Gas stations just to fuel their cars. Have you greeted your boss one morning when he/she walks in and bang-he/she slamms the door right in your face? It’s not you, your boss was just burnt out from stress! Somehow, I always try to manage my emotions each time stress creeps on me and, because this is my area of expertise, I try not to allow it control me.
Still on personal hygiene, which most people find hard to maintain due to lack of power and water supply at their homes, I keep thinking how most ladies who live under such conditions cope with their feminine hygiene. Ordinary, water and electricity supply are basic facilities everyone should have regularly both at home and office (rich and poor) but, what do we have here? Survival of the crudest and most fraudulent! Yes, you want to join them like they say here, you follow their crude and fraudulent ways so you can avoid hassles and pains in getting what you desire for a comfortable living.
Those of you who have experienced or are suffering from stress will understand what am driving at. People will experience all kinds of ill health, skin and emotional problem without knowing that stress is causing it. They will be taking all kinds of medications to no avail till they tackle the accumulation of stress in their life. What creates stress? Is it not inhabitable method and style of living? Do you folks know that too much worry create Stress and from stress other body/health problems will come in? What do people worry about? Bad conditions of living and worries about how to make ends meet here and there, sour marriages/love relationships etc!
For females, It creates all kinds of health problems like hormonal unbalance, infertility, overweight as well as skin problems like pimples, acne, wrinkles, eye bag/sagging. You see some young ladies ageing and developing wrinkles faster than their age. They are under Stress. You see people eat all the fatty foods but they still look like dry fish. You wonder why someone eats so much food and still not add some flesh or grow a little fat; Stress is ravaging him/her. How about men who have sexual dysfunction that is almost ruining their marriage? Most men with potbelly who encounter sexual problems keep taking all kinds of herbal medications but never solving their problem. Stress and excess fat is at work and they are drinking all kinds of herbs and concoctions and neglecting to get rid of stress/excess belly fat which is the main causes of their problem.
Years back, January 25th 2011 to be precise when I was with THE SUN NEWSPAPERS Nigeria, I wrote an article on male sexual problems and the responses from men were overwhelming, unbelievable!! Most of these men never knew that Stress could be the cause of their sexual non-performance till they read that article. By the time these men know it, it’s either their marriage develops crack or collapse, wife looking somewhere else and all kinds of unpleasant effects from Stress.
The last lap, depression sets in and someone keeps drifting out of life reality slowly till the worst happens. Have you ever experienced depression? Pray not to!! Have you ever encountered a depressed person? He/she is in a world of non-existence leading to life expiration…that’s why suicide tendency comes in and happens often with depressed persons.{I talked about DEPRESSION here couple of weeks back}
I have a paper I deliver to executives in seminars, conferences, retreats titled- EXECUTIVE STRESS/HEALTH MANAGEMENT. Each time I discussed the bad effects of stress which is SOUR MARRIAGE/ROMANCE, my delegates will never allow the seminar to close. Those who were napping and tired will immediately wake up. It happens all the time and from my experience in delivering this particular paper since 2006, I discovered that most men suffer from this particular effect of stress and at the end, I am always happy getting voluntary confessions, intriguing questions from them which means, part of their problem is solved.
My final word to those who really care about living healthy, not being depressed and having healthy marriages always, being productive at work is, to strive to avoid anyone and situations making life a nightmare for you. Manage the little resources you have to eat good healthy foods to nourish your skin/body. Avoid stress by all means because it ages someone fast and creates very frustrating and embarrassing health, wellness problems for men in particular when it comes to good sexual performance relating to premature ejaculation, erection problem etc. It also renders executives non-productive in their businesses and work place.
You can consult a Stress expert/Life coach who can guide/counsel you online/phone and give you suitable therapy you need. So anyone can manage stress from wherever you are as long as you are dedicated to work on your problems. There is nothing to be ashamed of here. Reach out for help!!!Feel free to post your questions on how to manage your Stress problems at my contacts below.
Jacqui IWU is a Media Communications & PR strategist|A Life &Business Coach with passion for youth and women Economic/Social Empowerment. |Twitter- |@vivantjacqui|@Jacquiworld|#talkbacktobwj
